Since last Friday, we’ve been gleefully posting Eugene Mirman’s dispatches from Copenhagen, Denmark where he’s sort of, barely, not really at all, covering the UN Climate Conference for Grist.org. We’ll admit — and maybe this is the point — we had no idea such a conference existed before our friend Eugene tricked us into knowing about it. We feel smarter, but somehow dirtier for learning something.

Anyway, in this installment, Eugene talks to a polar bear — is it real or not? — represents the United States by handing out climate literature and forces a local to apologize for his city’s penchant for piping in loud, crappy dance music in every square inch of Copenhagen.

Check out Mirman’s first two videos from Denmark here and here.